Q: Why do vegans give good head?

A: Because they are used to eating nuts. 

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Q: Why are all lesbians vegetarian?

A: Because they don't eat meat.

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Q: What do you call a vegan guy who likes to pleasure himself?

A: A non-dairy creamer.

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Q: What do Tofu And Dildos Have In Common?

A: They're Both Meat Substitutes!

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Q: What do yo call a vegan post-punk band?

A: Soy Division.

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Q: Why do gay vegetarians only eat hummus?

A: Because they are hummusexuals?

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source: http://www.jokes4us.com/dirtyjokes/vegetarianjokes.html