Hey you,
I'm not sure if you're like me but when I first found Vegfriend I was really excited. Being a vegetarian in the mid-west is pretty uncommon, I'm almost always the odd one out. When I heard about this site I thought it would be awesome to finally to connect with people who also didn't eat meat, but also vegans because I'm pretty interested in the vegan lifestyle. I've always heard that vegans are stuck-up and very critical of those who don't choose to live a vegan lifestyle. I figured this was a misconception and by joining this site I could prove how open and welcoming the vegan community is... I was wrong. For the most part the vegans that I have met on Vegfriend are exactly like the vegans I heard about growing up. There's a constant feel like you aren't as great as they are, and that being a vegetarian is basically worthless unless you go the extra step to become a vegan. Now I assume that not all vegans are like this, because that's really crappy. I can only speak for myself and not on behalf of all vegetarians but I am friends with all types of people. I have dated people who eat meat and I can go to a steak house with friends, yet I never feel a need to force my views on others.I don't understand why the vegans I have met are so judgmental and feel superior to me just because they don't eat animal products like eggs and dairy. Honestly after interacting with so many different vegans on Vegfriend I am starting to reconsider the vegan lifestyle. I have had countless people belittle me because I still eat cheese on this site as if being a vegetarian is not a step in the right direction. We should be applauding those who are taking steps in the right direction, instead of bashing them for not crossing the finish line. 

Views: 203

Comment by tasha on February 10, 2015 at 1:40pm
people are people. I think you should keep being the awesome person you are, and not care what others think of you :)
Comment by Plaf on February 10, 2015 at 2:45pm
Hey Rachel, I am vegetarian and I can agree with you. I have talked to many vegan people (not only on this site) who are exactly like you said. They think they are something better and let you feel it. Once I talked to a girl who really hated me for being vegetarian. She meant that vegetarians are worse than meat eaters. I nearly started to eat meat again because of that person. It was really frustrating experience. But many vegans are not like this. I have also talked to many very supportive vegans. Therefore I still wanna change to a vegan lifestyle. If you wanna turn vegan, do it and be one of those vegan people who are supportive :-).
Comment by Absolute Mango on February 10, 2015 at 3:46pm

yaahhhhhh im so sorry this has happened ! I hate that but one of my best friends is vegan and she comes off that way to people sometimes but only because she is so strong in her point of view. It is pretty irrational honestly.  like how meat eaters hate all vegetarians and vegans ha. It is applicable to almost every view unfortunately. To me, part of being vegan is supposed to be unconditional compassion. In my eyes the most important part. I admire you and pretty much worship you for being vegetarian! Dont give up <3 we all have good intentions and are all on the right path. :)

Comment by Rachel Hoyles on February 10, 2015 at 10:22pm

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying all vegans are this way. This was no way suppose to come across as a vegan bash, and I apologize if it did or offended anyone. I agree with Jenii about everyone having different views and lord knows that people of all walks of life will always find something they don't like about you. I just honestly believe that if more vegans, and hey even more vegetarians (because I'm sure there are also some vegetarians who act this way towards meat eaters) were more welcoming to, dare I say outsiders maybe more "outsiders" would join them. I can only speak from personal experience but I was turned off by the lack of respect I was given by vegans just because I'm a vegetarian. I fully understand the commitment and how hard it truly is to be a vegan! I thought by joining Vegfriend I would be able to learn more about being a vegan and meet some pretty cool open minded people. Clearly not everyone on this site is close minded and there are plenty of cool people. There's just also a lot of not so cool close minded people as well if you don't choose their lifestyle. I felt/feel as though everyone is on their own journey to a healthier lifestyle but some people take longer to get there. If a began/vegetarian community we welcomed "outsiders" and gave information when it was wanted or needed instead of being pushing and standoffish because of the choices maybe they would be more inclined to listen....but hey this is just my thoughts.

Comment by Jelena on February 10, 2015 at 10:32pm

Huh, well that's the first time I hear this. I've never had those experiences on Vegfriend yet, and I'm still a vegetarian. Also, I've talked to QUITE a lot of people on here already.

I've felt really welcome here. Maybe because I openly show my enthusiasm about veganism, and that I'm willing to learn. Who knows

Comment by Melissa Guillemette on March 2, 2015 at 12:49am

The honest truth: It can be VERY hard as a vegan to accept someone following a vegetarian lifestyle- specifically if that person claims to follow it out of concern for the animals. To a vegan, a vegetarian diet is full of hypocrisy and that is part of the reason we are generally 'not ok' with it. If you are vegetarian strictly for animal rights, your diet as a vegetarian is still supporting animal cruelty, hence the contradictions. If you are vegetarian simply for health reasons or whatnot, then that's a different story.

Essentially once you start doing a bunch of research and educating yourself more on the evils and what exactly the dairy and egg industry encompasses, you can't unlearn those things and from then on out, it comes down to what you do with the information you receive. Do you still choose to support an industry that results in needless animal suffering?

There comes a time when you have learned enough to the point where things magically become VERY black and white in your mind. When you reach that point, you understand exactly how and why most vegans seem so pushy/standoffish/passionate etc. about their cause. It just kind of "makes sense". 

I was not always vegan and I used to have the same misconception about vegans being "stuck up", "snobby", "elitist" etc. but I no longer feel that way because I understand WHY they act the way they do. Don't let your feelings about vegans deter you from making positive changes in your life because those changes will help not only just you but also the entire world you live in. XoX

Comment by Yannick Zo on March 6, 2015 at 7:27pm

I personally think we are all hypocrites to some degree and we all have our different standards and definitions about a hypocrite.  For me, for example, a hypocrite could also be someone who is vegan and owns a car. For me caring about animal rights goes hand in hand with caring about our planet and every ecological impact our actions have. 

because, like you said, if you do research you know how the production of eggs and dairy actually works, well if you do research you know what impacts cars have on our ecosystem. 

I believe that one can get around with bikes, public transport and maybe if really necessairy a rental car every now and then.  

Anyway what I'm trying to point out is that, I'm a lacto vegetarian, I have my principles and I try to contribute to change in my own way, as do many people.  I think it's important not to judge and to acknowledge every persons contribution and choices towards change, whether it's being a vegetarian or vegan or someone who eats meat but is against the use and production of fur and leather. In my eyes that doesn't make someone a hypocrite, I'm happy when a friend of mine decides to tone down his/her meat consumption to once a week for example, every small positive change that a person makes should be celebrated and not judged. 

Comment by Lady Annapurna on May 15, 2015 at 5:37pm

I have been trough the same thing. I am vegetarian and have been so for a couple of years, I like my eggs, once or twice in a week and I like my cheese in the salad. I have both heard hatred from both meat eaters and vegan. You do not get anywhere by hating people for what they like or even look. Hatred, Racism,anger and ego are poisons that only will cause pain and suffering, not only for your fellow brother and sisters, but to yourself as well, and it creates only bad karma as well. Everybody should respect one and other. You do not have to change just because one thinks or say so. Like my eternal love said to me some time ago "I do not care what they  think, that is their problem, not mine." That is exactly my opinion this days to "Who cares what they think about me being vegetarian, that is their problem, not mine" :)

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